Retail Witness [3]: Snippets

Retail allows me come into contact with many interesting people and sometimes these brief interactions stay with me. The following are snippets of real conversations:

Me: We will hold the item for 2 weeks.
Customer: So, if I come in tomorrow you will have it on hold?
Me: (pause) yes, we will hold the item for 2 weeks.
Customer: oh, ok.


Customer: Can I check out here?
Me: Yes, hold on a second.
Customer: 1… 2… 3… 4… 5… already 5 seconds. 6.
Me: Sir, please stop. You are being rude.


Customer: I know it was at the front of your store, with a blue cover.
Customer: It was on a round table up front by the registers.
Me: I’m sorry, but we don’t have those kinds of tables in our store.
Customer: Yes you do.


Customer knocks over a cart of items.
Customer: Oh, did I do that?
Me: That’s ok, I will pick them up.
Customer: Yea, sorry about that. I knocked it over because I’m so fat.
Me: (pause) (what am I suppose to say to that?)


Customer: I bought this 6 months ago, can I return it?
Me: Our return policy is 2 weeks with a receipt. I’m sorry but I can’ return something you bought 6 months ago.
Customer: I don’t have a receipt. Oh, and I bought it more than 6 months ago.
Me: No, I’m sorry I still can’t give you a refund.


[1]: The Cookie[2]: First in Line

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About Inner Love

I want: Passion. Desire. To create Cosmos. I want: Expression. Depth. Meaning. I want: Joy. Laughter. Love. I want: Life. View all posts by Inner Love

8 responses to “Retail Witness [3]: Snippets

  • Roger's Place

    I love those conversations. If I can, I do an improv thing with the people. Pretty soon we are all laughing.

    People can be so “out of it” sometimes. 8)

  • slamdunk

    Interesting exchanges.

    I say that “one minute” or “one second” all the time and the kids burn me on it by counting or something.

    • Suzanne

      I can certainly understand it from kids. This customer was an adult man and maybe if he wasn’t shopping after I made the closing announcement and maybe if he had stopped at 3 and maybe if I wasn’t already tired… haha, ok, too many maybes already.

  • Jacky Cheng

    haha those are hilarious! having worked in a restaurant, i definitely get your frustration with customers. sometimes, they really say the most ridiculous things.

    i can’t believe i haven’t been on your blog in so long! i guess i’ve been in an hiatus with the blogging world haha. still love your stuff though!

  • Jen

    Too funny! I use to work in retail and had some very interesting discussions with people also. There were days that I would wonder how people could even get to the mall in one piece.

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